Anyone who knew him will have heard the news already.
I really didn't know him. I only corresponded with him for a while.
I'm evidently going to have the Clash's Stay Free running through my head until I find some way to think about this, so here it is: I once, at his invitation, wrote an extended doggerel / drinking song about his death, adding on to an earlier one about the mishaps that he chronicled. That will have to be it.
I really didn't know him. I only corresponded with him for a while.
I'm evidently going to have the Clash's Stay Free running through my head until I find some way to think about this, so here it is: I once, at his invitation, wrote an extended doggerel / drinking song about his death, adding on to an earlier one about the mishaps that he chronicled. That will have to be it.
[Begin chorus]
They tell of a
man from Californiay
Who thought that
his diss would be done some day
The Devil looked
up, said "I'll make him pay"
So drink one for
the troubles of SEK
[end chorus]
Now SEK's list of
trials is long
And we'll see
who's still standing after this song
He was beat up in
high school, he didn't belong
But it was in
grad school that things went wrong
[Chorus]
And when his
thesis had just begun
He turned against
Theory, said that wasn't fun
The New
Historicism is the one
He's stuck
reading and re-reading Jack London
[Chorus]
The doctor told
him about his thyroid
He didn't want
his wife to be annoyed
"If I hide
it from everyone I'll stay employed"
So four months of
concealment he enjoyed
[Chorus]
Now SEK came to
his office door
And found two
students going at it on the floor
"This will
make a good story" he thought before
The Sexual
Harassment Office sent letters galore
[Chorus]
And when he was
down, and his thoughts were thick
His gloom was
interrupted by Honda Civic
The car slammed
into him and was gone in a lick
At least six
months of rehab went by quick
[Chorus]
But the most
annoying were Internet trolls
Threats of bodily
harm will take their toll
They sent letters
to his boss, and to every soul
They could find
in the whole county's Email roll
[Chorus]
He got pictures
of the husband of his friend
Having sex with a
horde; he thought that was the end
Should he tell
her? He went and hit "send"
Now he can't go
home, or with thugs he'll contend
[Chorus]
After all those
troubles, he still wasn't drowned
Well, it was
absurd, but this might be the crown
Overpayment of
library fines will bring him down
He's no longer a
student, just a proper noun
[Chorus]
He told us all
this when he started a blog
And how fate or
the Devil made him jump like a frog
The hiring
committee looked on agog
If we hire him --
then our luck will fog
[Chorus]
The Devil looked
up and laughed and laughed
The diss was
done, SEK was on staff
His appointment
wasn't tenure track
He'd be lecturing
freshman till Hell and back
[Chorus]
The Devil liked
what he did see
"I'll make SEK
live eternally
He'll crush
people's souls, and turn them to me
Academics will
cry as I laugh with glee"
[Chorus]
When the Devil's
plans caught up the poor sod
That brought the
eye of an angry God
Volcanoes and
plagues came down in turn
To stop the Devil,
SEK must burn
[Chorus]
He looked at his
smoldering car in despair
SEK looked up,
shook his fist in the air
"I've
survived again, and as you can see
There's
nothing more you can do to me"
[Chorus]
As he raised his
arm with a defiant shout
A massive
lightning bolt snuffed him out
The electric
charge was so whole-hog
A freak power
surge erased his blog
[Chorus]
And that was the
end of SEK
To his memory we
drink today
Lest we get his
luck, get squashed like a bug
The rest of the bottle we now will chug
Posts
Another sad day
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